Wednesday 19th November  14:20 pm Good Afternoon

on today on tomorrow other dates...

Nelson's Column October We Don't Mind a Little Delay... 21st October 2005 So Long as Brad's on the Bus Breakdown on the Northern Line, bus and tube fares set to rise, talk of increased fines and ASBOs for fare dodgers, not to mention forecasts of a massive rise in commuters over the next decade – it’s been quite a month for travel news. But travel trouble in London is about as astonishing as the return of the Mitchell brothers to Albert Square. Well-trodden, dull as dish water, I considered how to inject some life into the subject. Damp outside, I didn’t want to leave my desk, sure that my faithful friend, the internet, would come to my rescue. Surely forums and message boards would offer up a world of plucky commentators ready to feed me with up-to-the-minute incisive critiques on the state of our capital’s transport system? Half an hour trawling the web unearthed a poisonous bed of bile and vitriol aimed squarely on the jaw of London transport. Fantastic. But had the headlines hit on people’s real concerns? Right from the start, complaints weren’t tallying with the headlines. A number of people were carping about eye-contact on the tube. Unfriendly, impersonal city? Perish the thought. To an extent, looking at other people can lead to unwanted attention but also to unexpected amusement. When a Brad-a-like stepped on the bus the other day and me and four or five other female passengers caught each others' eyes, it was all smiles. Apparently Tom Cruise might not like being looked in the eye but I think the rest of us should get over it. Many bus passengers, unhappy about the roadside ticket machines were slighting Ken. Of course, the machines are rubbish! Ken wants us all to take five minutes to get an Oyster Card. And those of you who can’t handle the Oyster, don’t complain about the queues please, you’re the root cause! But enough of my personal bile and vitriol…. Predictably, Traffic wardens took a good metaphorical kicking, but internet users real object of hate were loud Aussies on the tubes and buses. Always a point of contention, our Antipodean cousins either inspire loathing or love. Loud and brash, but fun and friendly. Give them a chance I say, but try not to be there when they’re making a phone call. Despite all that’s been going on in transport this month it seemed that people’s biggest hate – or the one they most liked to talk about - was other passengers’ body odour. Now, we’ve all been stuck under an armpit that smells like an old gym towel but, trust me, the air conditioned underground in Barcelona has the same trouble. Sweat happens. It appears neither the papers nor the legislators are connecting with my pals on the net. With forums, message boards and blogs having more of an influence maybe they should take notice of London’s electronic community. If they did, next year could see unexplained outbreaks of eye-contact on the Northern Line, record numbers of Australians on buses and trains, and talk of ASBOs for repeat rush hour BO offenders (sniffer dogs to be placed at all major stations). Posh Shops' Top Hot Spot New Bond Street is now officially the UK’s most expensive retail street. The Mayfair address has overtaken Oxford Street for the first time in 20 years, fuelling a 25% rise in annual rents to £3,800 per sq metre. Clean Sweep for Battersea Chimneys Battersea Power Station’s iconic chimneys are to be pulled down and rebuilt – despite protestations from as far afield as Ohio, Sweden and Holland. Wandsworth Council rejected proposals to refurbish the chimneys; supporting instead the view of the developers, Parkview International, that it would be impossible to repair the chimneys as they stood. Turner Prize Gets Back to Basics Has the Turner Prize gone mainstream? For the first time in five years a conventional artist working exclusively in paint has been nominated for the £25,000 prize. Painter Gillian Carnegie is the favourite to win over the other nominees; three installation artists. The winner will be announced on 5th December. October 2008 24th October Boris v Jingjing 17th October Soaps in Pole Position September 2008 23rd September Chips too Chavvy for Chelsea 16th September The London Restaurant Awards August 2008 26th August No Smoking, No Ducks, No Barbecues 20th August The Olympics July 2008 24th July Sandwiched Out 17th July The Show Ain't Over 'Til the Fat Lady's on Page 3 June 2008 26th June Love All at Wimbledon 16th June Miller Puts the Heat on Tennant May 2008 27th May Booze Banned on Buses 20th May Same Again? April 2008 23rd April By George 11th April Back to the 80s March 2008 28th March How do You Solve A Problem Like Medea? 20th March Flight Fantastic February 2008 20th February Dark, Satanic Turnmills 6th February A Diamond in the Drink January 2008 21st January People Wanted for Plinth 14th January Boo! Hiss! December 2007 28th December Tate That - A Hirst for Art 20th December Christmas Shopping November 2007 27th November Mind the Gap 26th November London On A Tray October 2007 26th October Leaving the Station 14th October The Sky's the Limit September 2007 26th September The Play Within A Play 19th September Fashion, Frocks and Celeb Shocks 12th September Saying Tanks for the Mammaries August 2007 24th August Heathrow under Siege 17th August Gormless 10th August Losing Face July 2007 24th July Are We Reaching Boiling Point Yet This Summer? 13th July Red Ken versus Blonde Boris June 2007 22nd June Last Orders at the Fag Machine 11th June London the Musical May 2007 21st May What Lurks Beneath 10th May The Stuff Dreams Are Made Of April 2007 27th April London’s Walk on the Wild Side 20th April Stand Behind the Yellow Line 13th April Like Water for Chocolate March 2007 23rd March So, Another Magazine 16th March Avoiding iContact February 2007 23rd February Sex and Art... 16th February C-Charge Protest Fails to Bring Down Government 9th February Live Earth London January 2007 26th January A Vote for Shilpa is a Vote for Britain 18th January Carriage on up the West End December 2006 29th December Food for Thought 22nd December A Poisonous Marketing Campaign 15th December In for a Penny, In for Five Pounds November 2006 17th November Big Department Stores Leave Santa Out in the Cold 10th November Failing to Save the World October 2006 27th October Frozen Prawns and Melting Icecaps 20th October Predatory Pelicans and Happy Woodland Folk 13th October Hope at last for east end of Oxford Street September 2006 16th September Lite the Blue Paper and Stand Well Back 9th September Of Poles and Twiglets August 2006 25th August Free Fares For the Fat and the Fashionable 11th August London Friendly 4th August Archway To Organic Heaven July 2006 21st July London - Celebrity Frat House 7th July Out of the Galleries into the Streets June 2006 23rd June Mayors, Nightmares and Marias 16th June Downright Rude in Paris and London 9th June Enter the Inferno May 2006 26th May Curvaceous Border 12th May Vegging Out April 2006 21st April The Camden Crawl 17th April Down the Pan 13th April I Want to Break Free 9th April Big Brother seems to have been left in a bar somewhere 7th April Don't Box Me In March 2006 24th March Political Correctness Reaches New Heights February 2006 24th February A Stadium's Tale: Cup Final Goes West 17th February Modern Musicals are Rubbish 10th February The City-Side Alliance January 2006 20th January February Sales 20th January Moby Sick 13th January Glass Half Full 3rd January Three Cheers for the Tube Station Workers December 2005 22nd December January Bites 16th December A Remarkable Year November 2005 25th November And a Partridge in a JCB 11th November Driving Miss Sadie 4th November Spam, Spam, Spammity-Spam, Shakespeare, Zorro, Chico and Rasputin October 2005 28th October Trick or Treat? 21st October We Don't Mind a Little Delay... 14th October Final Resting Place for Young British Artists September 2005 16th September Just a small urn for me, please barman 9th September DRINK! DRINK! DRINK! 2nd September The Free Tenor August 2005 30th August Samba Rhythms Breaking Out All Over The Stadium 20th August Getting Behind the Iron Farce